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Friday, June 02, 2006

friendship Friday June 2, 2006

I find it interesting how life throws friends at you and you have to decide how or if they fit into your life. What bothers me more than anything is the fact that everyone tries to put friendhsips into little boxes... if the person messes up, or the frienship isn't a conventional one... its always questioned..

can you be friends with someone you've slept with?
can you be friends with an ex?
can you be friends with your best-friends partner? or does that run the risk of taking sides?
can you be friends with your parents?
can you be friends with your ex's friends??

I think that unconciously we always question our frienships.. sabotage them, take them for granted... so there's teh friends that no matter what you do, they know that you are a good person... and forgive you... then there's the friends that just get lost along the way...

I have a handful of really good friends... and I know I'm lucky for that.

23 years
23 years
12 years
20 years
12 years
 3 years
5 years
12 years

these are the people that would go out of their way for me, and I them... Coming up with that list I have so many other people I think that I would bend over backwards for.... but who have gotten lost along theway... and then there's the friends that you have. but don't know for how long....

Then there's the question of love. Who can you love? and when does it become confusing.... clearly.. it'll probably get more confusing with someone of the opposite sex if you are hetero that is! So, if you have a guy friend.... are you allowed to love him? are you allowed to fall in love with him? cause what does that mean exactly... that you love themfor everything they are right??? that you love spending time with them... that you would do anything for the...

but then... what's crossing the boundary? can you love someone yet remain just friends.. or does it cross into that confusing place where one person wants more.. and the other friend doesn't.. ruining theperfect friendhsip you once had.

How long is too early to love someone??? This is always a question that plagues me... with my last boyfriend I knew i loved him in the first 3 months... I decided to tell him around the 3 month mark cause I didn't want to wait and put pressure on him.... and he never ever said it... but that's a whole other story.... but really? when is too early.. or is there a too early? can you love a friend that you just made???

Because I just moved to the city I have made a couple of friends.... and these are deffinately people that I would do anything for.. right now.... but then if I love them am I running the risk of being used? or of expecting more from them then they are willing to give to someone they just met?

so, then if you do love someone... when can you tell them? I've always lived by the notion that people should know when they are loved. Nomatter how rediculous... or inconvenient.. that there isn't enough love in the world... and as a result you should say it as much as you can....

that's my mom talking:P


I believe that frienship and love is hard to come by, and as a result putting either into a box limits both even further. If you find someone who loves you... wants to spend time with you and affords you the privelege of good conversation then embrace it....

if you limit your friendhips you limit yourself. I may be a dreamer but I think you can be friends with someone you've slept with, your ex, your friends partner, your parents, your ex's friends....
Officially? My friendships are what gets me up in the morning.... and I love them..... I don't care how long I've known them for.... if they are in my life... they are clearly special people.... and they deserve my love.....


the 2am ramblings of yours trully....

the weird things that go on in my own head....

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