Well its been a while... and well its certainly been a while since I wrote anything about my sex life... so no, since I came to Korea I haven't been completely without... but, like I've said before I'm looking for more, so I'm trying to be a little more cautious about who I sleep with and my motivations behind it.. and I think in 6 months I can honestly say I haven't slept with anyone because i'm depressed or any other negative emotions...
I'm not sure what I've written about my life in the past 6 months... but tonight I had a friend over and she was asking about sex advice and so I was telling her.. and then I felt compelled to share this blog with her... rereading some of my experiences was fun.. I laughed and relived some of the craziness that has been my life over the past 2 years. I also realized I really liked writeng about these experiences...its also like a documentation of my life.. from a different perspective.. and so thus fel compelled to write about my most recent activities with men... if for no one else... for myself!
So, just to catch you up... when I first got here there was this guy I met through friends... he was English and the first night we met we hung out and chatted all night and he kept coaxing me to come home with him... or II guess to come home with me because he was currently staying at a friend's house... I politely said no... you wish and at 5:30am... drove away in a cab blowing a kiss...
after that we had run into each other 4 times... always with a little hint of maybe we should sleep together. Then one night we were at the bar and one of his oldest friends had come down from Seoul and was watching us together and told us how great we were together and how I was perfect for him... that he needed a girl like me in his life... well the approval of the friend is always nice... we flirted all night.. and then at the end of the night he ended up losing his keys, so I invited him back to my place...
He came back here and he made out with me... it was soooo hot and more than anything I wanted to sleep with him.. but like I've said time and time again when I like someone I don't sleep with them... so I said no... everyone cell in my body screamed at me for saying no, but I said no none-the-less.... he left the next morning...
the next time I saw him I had sort of gotten over my little concerns for waiting and by the end of the night I really just couldn't wait any longer so I asked him if I could come home with him... he seemed a little weird about it but then was like sure... we took the cab back to his house... by the time we almost had walked from where the cab had droped us off to his front door he realized he had left something really important back at the bar... so being the well trained gf that I am I took off down the street, walking as fast as I could back to the bar... him following slowly behind me...
I got back to the bar.. my feet killing me, found his lost articles... hoping of course that I would be readily thanked for my excursions off in high heels to find his lost things...
Well we walked back to his house, when we got home we hung out for a bit, ended up having an impromptu water fight laughed and teased eachother... and then got into bed.. we were making out when his friend showed up because he had taken his phone! Embarrassed, but thank god fully clothed, I helped him find his phone and got him out of the house....
well that was it with that... the following weekend we ended up running into eachother and he ended up telling me that he had been cool to me all day because he didn't want anything more than friends... What you were being stand=offish with me? hadn't noticed... lol I was pissed... I mean he had basically full out ignored me all day... barely looked at me and was now hitting on another girl that was with us... ironically a friend that had been there the first night we had met... Anyways, he then went on to tell me that that night had been a mistake...
are you kidding me?
I called him on I said.. so what about all the times before that when he had asked me to come home with him? how about all the times he had gotten sober between those times??? Did he not decide before that night that maybe he didn't want to sleep with me?? Bull shit!
Then he said I had just followed him home.. that he didn't really want me there!
Oh save me the time.. I basically looked at him dead in the eye and said "save your bullshit for someone else... I don't have time for this... grow some balls.. if you don't like me fine.. but don't lie about it or make it into something its not... AHHHH rethinking about it makes me so mad... anyways, we all ended up going off and doing separate things.. I ended up running into him again later at another bar... and he made sure to tell me he was leaving when the friend had asked to leave... cause of course I wanted to know. just incase she hadn't figured out nothing else was ever going to happen...
So that was English boy.
The next guy that something happened was an old friend of mine. I headed up to Seoul for a weekend... and we had been talking for ages... I won't write too much about him because I don't like writing too much about people I know or friends... But basically we have a very innocent history one with us having talked for 6 years about liking eachother... sometimes about sex, sometimes just about thinking eachother is hot... but he's here and I had met him in Uni and nothing had ever happened except a first kiss the first time I met him...
So he's here in Korea... this guy that I had been fantasizing about for years... and we had talked on msn a few times... we had planned on meeting up... he had said that he had really liked me but always fucks these kinds of things up... and well I didn't know at the time... but he was right!!!
So I went to Seoul, and when I called him when I got there he didn't respond to my call... I let it be and then at about 12am at this music fest I was at.. he randomly shows up... 6 years... and randomly he's there... trashed... but I had had this fantasy in my head and his drunken ass wasn't going to ruin for me... I ended up going back to his place... I'll spare you the unexcitement of the whole excursion.. but that's what it was.. unexciting...
so that was Uni boy.
So for the next 3 months there really wasn't anyone, except for one day where I met this guy... we spent a Saturday at my house watching shows and getting intoxicated.. laughing and getting to know eachother... making out... and then him leave only to have him never talk to me again... which was sooo weird...
But in July we ended up going to this awesome festival on the west coast of Korea called the mud festival.. and that's exactly what it was... a mud festival... it was the most amazing weekend of my life... topped off with a hot, sexy man.
I met him and his friends very soon after getting there.. they were all firefighters with the American airforce... I'll call him DB.. anyways, this man was super hot, super tall and there was no way I thought anything was going to happen... with anyone.. but deffinately not him... then he started hitting on me...
He invited me down to the water at one point to get cleaned off.. and I invited the rest of the boys... just before getting out of the water he asked met o stay for a moment.. and I said no... that I knew his type of guy and I was soo not interested... he said what type of guy.. and I said... you.. you're a player and I'm not interested... he assured me he wasn't.... and then said "you aren't as tough as you put off" like someone had just beatin my walls down in a second.. I had no where to hide... and well I told him that it was easier being tough than fall for someone and get hurt...
we ended up talking and kissing and he shared something really personal about himself... and by the end of the conversation I had said to him... "Even if its just going to be for a night... can I have this day and this night with you? would that be alright with you...?" He kissed me again..
we spent the afternoon together and then I lost him in the crowd...
that night... I went to dinner with girls... and then feeling a little bumbed I walked down to the beach by myself... Uni boy had said he'd be at the festival too, but hadn't called, or returned my text messages..
well I got down to the beach.. and there DB was... he threw his arms around me and kissed me and asked how I found him.. that there was 10,000 people on the beach, how could I have possibly found him? it must have been fate! We ended up spending the evening together, watching these amazing fireworks, drinking... kissing and playing soccer in this torential downpour...... it was phenomenol.
He spent the night/early morning on the floor of the hotel where the girls were... we tried to find someother place.. but to no avail.. so I shamelessly brought him back to the hotel room.
When we woke up in the morning he was gracious and kind, and kissed me.. and threw his arm around me.. it was wonderful...
We spent the morning together back down on the beach where he told me that we would deffinately see each other again... a promise I questioned.. but enjoyed hearing... walking away from him was sooo difficult... he told me to, if we don't see eachother again, remember that I'm a great person and to not hide that from the guys I meet. I walked away without looking back...
DB and I never saw eachother again, we talked a few times... but nothing ever worked out and he left at the start of September for a new term in Europe... but that weekend was the weekend that I will have forever.. it reminded me that great guys can and do exist... it put me on cloud nine.. and its basically all I could talk about.. he made me feel beautiful, and loved more than in my only relationship... and he reminded me that I'm not crazy to think that love does exist out there...
and that sometimes its ok to have a one night stand..
So since then there really hasn't been anything.. there has been the odd encounter at the bar, but I haven't made out or slept with anyone.. until this weekend...
its 3am and I'm exhausted I'll write about the rest tomorrow.
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