long time no write

well, its been a while... a little hiatus, time to reflect, reconsider whether I want the whole world.. or those very few that read my blog to know EVERYTHING about me. BUT.... this just had to be written, so I'm back.... and i'll fill you all in on my life's happenings over the past few months.

So.. I'm still on dating websites... the caliber of man that I am meeting seems to be going up and I am very excited about that.... but I need to cut to the chase... there's this guy... lets call him AD... well AD sends me a message on lavalife a while back, very cute pic, cute profile, so I write him back.. we add each other to msn, talk very briefly...

now here's the thing about msn, I don't particularly like it, its impersonal...disconnected... if like only 15% of what you communicate is the actual words... through msn you miss out on a very large portion of the communication... which always causes problems. .. so I don't really like msn to get to know guys... if you add me, we talk a few times great.. but invite me to go for coffee or something.. figure if we have any chemistry at all... and then get to know eachother....

so well guys who add me i'm sorta indifferent with them, i may talk to them, i may not, but i am certainly not going to not pick up the phone if it rings, or talk to other friends while i'm talking to a guy i don't know on msn....

this is my introduction.. you know setting the mood...

so this guy... AD .. haven't talked to him in a while, so last night I figure, why not say hi, he looks cute, put together... no harm done.. i don't know much about him, so within the first few minutes of us talking I ask him what he's looking for... he says just friends.. fair enough, great relationships can come from just friends... so then he tells me to tell him about myself... i don't know... I ask him to ask a question cause i don't know where to start... so he does... he asks me what my favorite colour is.. ok, so a little odd, and slightly on the "we are in grade two" but always given the benefit of the doubt... so i say pink... then he asks me what shade... and makes a joke about being metrosexual...

ah well, cute still a little weird.. cause I don't know.. when you are trying to get to know someone their favorite colour isn't very high on my list of priorities... maybe whether they are a picky eater.. politics, religion.. you know the big things.. cause if you aren't compatible on the big things... it probably has no foothold to begin with...

so back to colour... my phone rings.. its my cousin.. i go and talk to her... but i say to this guy i'll be right back..just to be polite...

i'm gone for 15 minutes, when i get back i realize that I really want a bath.. that's it... well i wish i had a transcript of this guys reaction to me... it was downright rediculous... basically he told me how much he hates lavalife girls, that he already deleted them all.. I was quite taken aback.... all i said was "hey AD I'm going to have a bath now, maybe we can talk again soon!" so.. he tells me how he doesn't know... cause he sees what lava girls are like... that the fact that i ditched him for a bath shows him something already... like where the fuck did that come from.. I DON'T KNOW YOU...

well if you haven't figured out that i am a little emotional and a little sensative... i am... i'm sorta surprised that i have given this impression of indifference and have offended this guy in any way..maybe he's a great guy.... maybe I shouldn't just walk away from the computer for once...

so our conversation keeps going.. i basically don't really know whats wrong.. but appologize for anything some girl must have done to him to make him so calous, jaded and pissed off at the world... i guess in the process he realizes that maybe I'm not that bad of a person....but I still feel like I'm trying to prove myself to this guy that I don't know... anyways, he finally asks me to call him so he can appologize, and "make nice"

i tell him at first that i won't cause as far as I am concerned I feel scrutinized and judged based on things that have nothing to do with me... and that's not fair... but again trying to see life from this guys angle, i realize that maybe something crappy happened to him that day.. i caught him at a bad time, he took out his frustrations on me and now he wants to appologize, so i call him...

me light humour.. but cut to the chase... expecting a normal guy on the phone I make light of the situation, expecting an appology, but tell him straight up how rude he was... god I wish I could tell you everything that was said... essentially this guy is the epitome of ADHD, manipulation and schitzo... he doesn't appologize but basically tries to explain to me that he was just annoyed at the fact that a few times i had come online,. said hi, then fucked off... fair enough, hadn't thought about it that way.. sorry...

but no appology.. i say to him, if you were so upset about that, why did you go right around and act like an asshole.. i mean an eye for an eye right? he doesn't get it...
basically everything i said he didn't listen too, he actually said some things later in the conversation taht i had already said.. and talked about them as though I didn't know (like that msn is incredibly disconnected and lacks alot of the communication) he'd ask a question.. I'd start telling him, and then all of a sudden in the middle of me talking he'd ask another random questions.... like " so where do you work?"...then i'd tell him and then before I was done he'd say so.. what did you get your degree in...

finally i had enough i asked him.. do you have a low attention span? YES.... he is ADHD.. crazy adhd....

this conversation gets better.. i can't type fast enough... ok, fair enough, people have disabilities... at one point he goes on for 5 minutes about how right now he's just looking for friends, that its hard to be friends with guys, so he prefers girls.. nothing sexual "that he has learned to control his hormones.. that he just wants to have more friends to chill with.. blah blah blah.. 5 minutes I swear to god...".. the he says "but i think you are looking for a relationship.. and well I think you are still looking for a relationship..." as though he had had a conversation with me, and I was trying to convince him taht I wasn't.... anyways, so later on I have made it very clear that I am looking for a relationship, that friends is just not where its at for me, and that being friends with a guy for no purpose of potential relationship.... when I met them off the internet is not what I want.. i have guy friends...

he basically declares that we are in a predicament cause I want somehting more and he wants something else.... fair enough... I agree.. I am at the point now where I really just don't like the guy.. think he's weird... and well really just don't want this to go anywhere.... but then he proceeds to ask me to send some pictures over.. remember.. ADHD... low attention span.. clearly doesn't rememebr what we just talked about...

i say why? I thought you just wanted to be friends.... what does it matter what I look like? apparently it does... oh there's another part to this conversation.. but I don't know how to write it to explain how crazy this guy is... anyways, I tell him naw.. its ok...that I'll think about it... blah blah blah... then he basically goes into analysing me... AGAIN... i say you know what.. I said I didn't want friends... I certainly don't want fuck friends.. and didn't you just tell me that you weren't interested in sex... that you "know how to control your hormones?" "well ya,. but you know there's nothing wrong with having someone you share an intimate connection with ... blah blah blah.. finally I said " you know what... I'm tired I need to go to sleep" his reaction "oh I see how it is" OH YES YOU DO MR. YOU ARE CRAZY.. I STAYED ON THE PHONE WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY TOO LONG... and now I realize that I'm losing time in my life that I will never ever get back talking to you...

so, politely i said, I'll talk to you soon, which was returned by unh hunh.... and then hung up the phone went immediately to msn and blocked and deleted him!.....

like I said.... I'm back!

ah facebook...

So, Facebook. My cousin told me about it... and now I'm stuck... suckered... pulled in to this thing... I'm addicted. HA, well two things... first, I posted this blog site.

Dilemma: Do I really want people that I knew when I was 5, to know about all my crazy antics... then they'll find me out.. not that spending 2 minutes with me wouldn't solve that.. but ya, i debated it.. and posted it anyways.

So for all of you that are looking at this blog.. that I have known in my youth... be prepared!
This blog got started cause every time I hung out with my friends I always had a new story to tell them about guys.. they could never keep them all straight.. but at least they would laugh at my animated story telling. As a result one of them suggested I start a blog because of how funny my life can get.... so, that's where it started... hope you enjoy!



so the other dilemma of facebook... there's this thing that says: how do you know this person.. and there's a place for "we hooked up" so, well, isn't that a little ridiculous... I could check mark the guys that I know that I've fooled around with.. and so everyone else could know. a little crazy even for me... but I laughed.. cause there are a couple of guys that it certainly would be funny to put that that's how I know them!

anyways, I think I'm going to go home for Xmas... stoked.. and nothing else exciting... ciao

adopt-a-boyfriend

So, i hae this friend... great friend, we've known each other since elementary school. In high school he came out and well we are from a really small town.. so being gay is not the easiest thing to admit to... I was the first person.. and the only person for a long time that he told.... and i feel so special to be that person... so... anyways, we've been through alot...

But, with life we drifted apart keeping updated and stuff... SO.. that brings us to yesterday. He invited me over.. I cooked dinner.. and he gave me a birthday present... he bought me CHANEL number 5 perfume... now here's the thing.. I love girly things but no one but my mom and my best friend have ever bought me perfume... so.. I was soooooooooo excited... I felt all girly...

then, to top the night off he bought me a cake-for-two and put a candle in it... so sweet... Gay men are the BEST adopt-a-boyfriends EVER!

have I got a story to tell you!

Alright... so the past 24 hours have been so eventful in my life I almost think that it's the craziest day yet... and well potentially the craziest post yet... To all those who don't know me, my life is always dramatic.. there's always shit going on... and well when there isn't I know it's going to happen soon...


I don't even know where to start. Maybe at the beginning.

So a really good friend came to visit yesterday we had a great day, I had a little extra cash from my birthday so we went shopping the first time I had been retail shopping and not window shopping in FOREVER. I bought these really hot and comfy jeans at the Gap, plus a couple other things... went for lunch...did the sex in the city thing and drank some cosmos sitting in the window of this restaurant, checking out guys with my friends.

We had a great day, and then rented a couple of movies and went back t my place for a girls night with wine and movies and cigarettes... lots and lots of cigarettes... first thing, the HUGE bottle of Zinfandel that we bought to drink if we ran out of our other wine fell out of the fridge, and smashed.... FUCK ASS... hehehe using the sheet that my friend .. had previously spilled red wine on and ruined.. we sopped it all up and then got cleaner to clean it... I now have the cleanest floor ever.. but isn't that how everyone cleans their kitchen?

we watched a movie, got drunk... chatted, had a great conversation in fact about religion and what we believe... blah blah blah..

realized that I am the worse arguer in the world cause there's nothing I believe full heartedly that I would lay my life down to prove a point... I think that's what's wrong with people, they get an opinion and then changing that is like taking their arm away or something... what's the point? information always changes... you just ahve to be ready to hear it:P ANYWAYS...

so this friend is dating this guy... and he's not the greatest to her... well in my opinion... I don't know him much, but I do know when you start dating someone they should do no wrong in your eyes... cloud nine as they say.. the first few months should be like you are permanently drunk the things that bother you shouldn't show up for atleast a few months when the things you once found endearing piss you off entirely:P well that's not the case so far... anyways, her upset, we decide to go out.... we join a 'mutual friend of mine'... well lets be honest the guy I was fucking for the past .. how long, I don't know... but we've gotten more to the friends stage of life... and fuck only on occasion... I ended up taking them to this bar that was full of university kids... God I felt old... the place reminded me of the place I used to hang out at in Guelph in first year....

ANYWAYS... had a great night...
end of the night.. got a guys phone number... and walked out of the bar to find... GUESS....

the best friend and the fuck friend kissing.. HA.... it gets better... so needless to say. awkward.... got into the cab.. tried to make light of it... "I'm going home and drinking lots of wine and smoking lots of weed... this is weird"

by the way have I mentioned I'm the nicest... maybe stupidest person in the world...

SO, we are back to the code.(refer to previous post)

Don't fuck your friends fucks... not that they are fucking.. but seriously...

So... I try to make a joke... but still get really upset... I am also retardedly drunk...

To hear... "Well... I really like her" from the guy... are you kidding me? it's not just a drunken "I'm horny" moment... this is actually something???

Oh so now I'm pissed... long story I try to be understanding.. fuck I don't care... but lets be honest.. I'm worried about giving up my monthly fuck.. hahaha

they both wanted to leave.. i figured if they left we wouldn't talk again so thought we should just talk it out... no use... I asked them to leave.

So.... THERE'S MORE...



WELL... it's been raining here for days... I get home to find my rug absolutely drenched in water.... like you know when you look at a bog it looks somwhat dry and then you step on it and your feet gets completely soaked... same thing... the water has come up THROUGH THE FUCKING FLOOR.... told you my life isn't boring...

so my very hung over self... realizes that it's Friday and I have to deal with this immediately.. no sleep for me!

So well... ended up at the Landlord and Tenant Tribunal... there for 2 hours.. just to get forms to fill out to make my landlord fix the problem.... and he has yet to call me back on where the fuck I'm supposed to stay tonight...


so that was my 24 hours...
so tired...

best birthday ever

well I won't bore you with the details other than for the first time on my birthday I hung out with the girls, had the time of my life and never once worried about guys, a boyfriend, getting laid or anything else like that... my girls had me all to themselves and we had a blast. The bartender bought me a couple of drinks... which ended up me giving him a retardedly big tip... now boys not like that...

BEST PRESENT EVER:

my two best friends: one of them and her boyfriend got me a DVD player
the other... no wait for it.... THE SPECIAL EDITION BOONDOCK SAINTS!!!

ok how fucking cool is that? I don't know about you, but I didn't know they even had a special edition and I have always been so dissapointed with the original dvd cause there are no special features on it.

besides that... my ex stole my original copy, so I have been boondock saint less.... I don't think I will ever get over that... ironic eh? I can get over just about everything.. but taking my sex in the city, the sweetest thing and my boondock saints movies... you suck bum!

back to the birthday... one of my friends got so drunk she got kicked out.. hilarious.... and we finished off the night with me buying the girls blowjob shots... the bartender made them the "right" way, with the shot on top of a turned over glass, with whipped cream lined from bottom to top... bottoms up ladies:P

very very hot...

the girls and I came back to my place, smoked some cigarettes... I kicked one of my friends out so she could go get laid... and well that's it... stayed up super late.. listening to an absolutely amazing CD that one of m friends made mewith all our songs from university... and ya, I think that's it.

and if you haen't seen the boondock saints.... RENT it RIGHT NOW

A new pet peeve

Ok, ladies and gentlemen. My newest pet peeve....People who read my blog, don't like and then feel it necessary to write me an e-mail telling me that it sucks... what's wrong with you?? seriously I know that there are people out there that may ot like my blog, my life, the way I write, and probably they are just jealous that I have sex way more than them. But, please spare me... if you don't like it.. MOVE ON. I like writing it, my friends like reading it, and really the only reason I do it is cause I like to make people laugh.. and well maybe some people can relate to me in some capacity that makes tehir life seem normal when they think its not.

More than anything it bothers me that these people have nothing better to do with their lives than be obnoxious.

that's my piece....

PS.

I got my birthday sex.. best sex I ever had. Best birthday present too ;)

some times men can redeem themselves... too bad we aren't always compatible!

seriously.. 24... not the greatest

So I turned 24 yesterday.. well I guess two days ago.. considering I usually write these blogs at 2am, and yes, its 2am again.

So I turned 24 on Monday... I never got laid, I never got drunk... I didn't get any presents.... it sucked... my aunt and I hung out... which was nice... but what is wrong with men? I stayed at a friends house on Sunday night hoping that i'd get a little booty when I woke up in the morning... or at least that night.. and nothing! what is wrong with him? I swear he is the most confusing man ever... we had sex all summer, and now... when I want it.. nothing.... pisses me off.

i'm having a party this weekend, which hopefully will prove more promising.

So what else is new? The ex called this past weekend... the worst thing an ex can do is call the girl after a long time... she's trying so damn hard to hate your guts.. and you go up and call.. STAY AWAY... she wants to talk to you... BUT SHE SHOULDN'T and it's not FAIR!!!

It just makes her confused and well annoyed that she WANTS TO SLEEP WITH YOU... but can't or she has officially lost all control!

so ya, boys STAY away from the ex-girlfriend... Especially if she's super nice and won't tell you to fuck yourself....

I know, I know I said I wouldn't put up with crap.... but its me.. and I'm too nice.. plus it was one of those days where I REALLY HATED being single.... so that didn't help either.

What else?? my plumbing.... hahaha my plumbing fucked up again... my landlords never fixed it since the last time....so officially that put getting some, a little on hold too!... cause I don't know about you, but I don't want some hot steamy night ending it.. "hey, baby? the toilet won't flush" ya that's hot! I should sue my landlords based on the fact that they have destroyed my sexcapades for a few days.

about my singlehood

i'm sorta getting sick and tired of the lack of men in my life. I get laid.. but sometimes its the most boring thing ever.. what happened with a guy grabbing a girl, ripping her clothes off, kissing every nook and cranny of her, having crazy passionate sex, doing it ALL NIGHT... and well having fun???

men are annoying, most of the time they are soo scared of getting off and giving the girl the worng impression... they suck... and they aren't very passionate.

So ya, I'm rambling again... but when do I not?


hope you enjoyed my rant.

A

best conversation ever

Him: "what do you do?"
Me: "I'm a condom tester for rough rider..."
Me: "what do you do?"
him: "I'm a psychological gynocologist"
Me: "Oh so you talk to women's pussies and make them feel better?"
him: "no they talk to me and make ME feel better"

seriously... we were both in stitches....

Internet Dating

so ya, I guess I'm feeling inspired today cause I have something else to go on about.... Internet Dating...

So, I know those that frown, those that belittle, those that are neutral and those that enjoy... and now, for your reading pleasure I will tell you my own take on internet dating...

YES I have done it... and yes I do enjoy it. I am actually a Plentyoffish.com kinda girl.. but that's cause I'm CHEAP... well you know what I mean... I'm not cheap if I have money... but cause I don't especially not to meet guys... POF is where its at...

Now, being a free-dating-site-kinda-gal you have more than your fair share of weirdos... but as far as I can tell.. no more than lavalife or campuskiss or any of those other dating sites... plus, at least this way you don't spend your hard earned cash talking to losers right???

So, yes although sometimes I wonder if I have stooped to an all time low with the internet dating thing, I feel as though there is no difference between finding/meeting someone in person and meeting them on line...


THE DEBATE:

now much of the debate comes from the fact that it is easier for people to lie... to not be who they claim to be.. to put up different pictures... TRUE, but seriously, do you honestly think that people who do this wouldn't do it to your face too? I mean if you met them on the street, or even in church group or something.. anything.. do you not think that maybe they would lie about somethings... so what you get to see their face... so the pic isn't a fake...but can you honestly claim that its safer to meet someone at one of those 30 second dating things... (that I know nothing about)???

there are a few things though about internet dating that are challenges...

1. its easier to really like someone... and then be disappointed when you meet them and there's no chemistry.
2. Its easier to be TOO honest about your life with a complete stranger... hahaha that's a funny one considering I tell complete strangers about my life on here:P
3. Indeed there is perhaps more inclination to lie if you don't meet the person.

HENCE... don't get too close to someone before you meet them... cause there is nothing more awkward than talking to someone about dating them, only to meet them and not think they are attractive...

Oh my biggest pet peeve with internet dating.. when people are offended that you don't write back if you don't think they are attractive... COME ON ladies and gentleman... I don't know about you.. but you do know about me.. and sex is VERY VERY IMPORTANT.. SO.... if I see your picture and I think there is no way in hell that I am going to sleep with you... that's it... there's no room for debate... SORRY!!!

so ya... i think I've said what I want to say about that!

the expensive side of being single

Last night... on my way out to the bar I had a great idea to write a rant about how expensive it is to be single... so here it is...

I don't know about any of you, but I remember living in a one bedroom apartment, beautiful, with all my things, a backyard, trees, in a great neighborhood... the internet.. the fastest you could get... cable TV and all the channels you could want...a car... driving anywhere...food in the refrigerator...and even special meals...a bottle of wine around...

going out for dinner a couple of days a week...

WHEN I WAS IN A COUPLE...

all of these things were possible cause we split it right down the middle... it was like you were living on your own...cause you can still walk around nekkid... get up when you wanted to.. not worry about anyone knowing your business....cause the person you were living with was all of your business...etc.

Now that I am single I find that the economy laughs at my singlehood... if you want to live on your own, the rent is ALL yours, the CABLE is all yours, the PHONE, the FOOD, the CAR, the GAS, the MOVIES the EVERYTHING...

its as though the world is saying... hahaha you are single and we are going to fuck you over until you find someone new to live with!

the generation above us wonders why so many youth are moving in with their partners so soon after they get together...well if you couldn't find a decent one bedroom for under a thousand dollars in the city... and your boyfriend/girlfriend was spending every waking minute at your place, what would you do???

Now the food... I don't know about you, but I have found that feeding one more mouth (the going from one to two people) costs pennies, but when you have to buy EVERYTHING on your own... you stick to Kraft dinner, eggs, bread and Tuna... anything that's quick, easy and cheap.

SO... for me, I have a bachelor apartment with NO internet, NO cable NO CAR, and very little in the way of food....

tangent: I just invested in 20$ bunny ears for the TV... I went to the Canadian Tire and the guy didn't know what I was talking about.... clearly I am regressing terribly as I grow older... cause NO ONE uses an antenna anymore... so... now that i have some for m of entertainment I'm not sooo bored at home.. the best thing though??? CBC and CTV have the comments for blind people.... hahaha, so I don't even get normal stations.. cause they don't broadcast them via antenna anymore.... you gotta love that!!!(a little embarrassing, but funny none-the-less)

back to the expensive part of life... so ya, I'm living this sort of nomad existence, ... then to top it all off, everything that one uses to get out of being single... the internet, bars, singles nights.... etc ALL COST MONEY... so then what???

I swear no wonder people get married or stay in school forever... cause its too damn expensive to be single!!!

ya there you go....